Ms. M:

Running With Scissors

October 05, 2006

I took my son to his annual Shriner's appointment today. We had a 7AM appointment in Greenville, SC (2 hour drive from ATL) and normally I would get up and drive it in the morning, but my normal appointments are usually 9AM. I wasn't about to get my ass out of bed at 4AM to drive 2 hours or so to Greenville! So we drove up last night and stayed in a hotel.

My son has been a Shriner patient since he was seven. He's got a leg length discrepancy which we've been seeing Shriner doctors for since 1997. He had surgery to stop the growth of the longer leg at the growth plate below the knee when he was 13 in 2003. We just go for follow-ups annually now to see if the surgery did its job.


Today we got the news that instead of the expected 4 cm difference between the tibias/fibulas if we hadn't done surgery, he now only has a 1 mm difference! I am WAY excited by this. He's worn lifts in his shoes for years, but after this surgery and his pubescent growth spurt he's got near identical length legs. It's AMAZING! I just didn't think I'd ever see his legs be the same length.

To be fair, he still has a little bit of deformity in his left leg. He was a 10 lb baby when he was born and I'm not a very big person to be delivering a 10 lb baby! So, he got so crowded in utero that his left leg started to curve with the wall of the uterus as he kept getting bigger. So his knee was contorted and his leg curved to a near 45 degree angle at birth, plus his left foot would flip up so the top of the foot would hit his knee. It was freaky!

He's grown out of it so much. His bones are straight and his foot is normal, the knee is still a tad contorted looking, but you hardly notice it unless you are looking for it.

So, I'm happy. Mark it on your calenders people.

In a related story, we stopped at Hooter's for dinner last night on our way up to Greenville. We pass this fucking Hooter's every time we drive to Greenville, and every time we do, since the kid was 7, he has asked to stop and eat there, and I always have said no. Of course he eventually admitted it was to SEE the hooters on the servers. I knew this all along of course, but the BF convinced me that I was being ridiculous for not taking him there. I just thought it would look tacky for a mother to take her small child there (he's not so small anymore!). But, D says that he has seen families eating there so I decided I WAS being ridiculous for not taking him there. It wasn't to protect him so much as that I generally did not care to eat the greasy food and be waited on by some chick in orange hot pants.

I was right, the food was so greasy that my gut was churning all night. I had a lovely night's sleep on a shitty mattress in a crappy hotel close to the hospital. Jack enjoyed checking out the teeny, tiny girls in teeny, tiny orange shorts and tight white tank tops. I've never seen such small girls in my life! I was under the impression that bodies so small were on children, not women. Perhaps these chicks really were children with stuffed bras and Hooter's uses slave labor???

Hoooo knows?

Sorry for the play on words...

Don't you think it's time for Hooter's to change their frickin' uniforms for their servers? I mean, these shorts look so Disco. Plus, it was freezing in there, I'm sure to assist the servers in receiving better tips from their male customers. But, give the chicks some sleeves for fuck's sake! CHEESIS H KROIST! Frigid temps were enough to make me want to eat and run! Too fuckin' cold in that joint!

So how has your week been? Seen any hooters lately? I think I missed Free Booby Tuesday on Billy's sight. I've been busy as a one armed paper hanger.


At 10/05/2006 9:45 PM , Blogger Nihilistic said...

Congrats on your little boy (maybe not little, but he is still YOUR little boy)!!!

At 10/09/2006 8:40 AM , Blogger J R Estelle said...

Congratulations on things going much better than you thought.

And Hooters...yeah, there's a reason it's cold in there.

At 10/09/2006 9:24 AM , Blogger Ms. M said...

nihilistic: thanks dude. He's not so little anymore, but I think, because of the surgery, he's topped out at a little of 5'9". He might see 5'10" but I'm not holding my breath!

jr estelle: yah, I just think that place is all about hooters more so than the food so I doubt I'll be eating there again. The food made my stomach a mess!


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